So.......

Well...I think I have finally figured out a few things in my life. I think I may almost feel at peace about it too...which is a wonderful, wonderful feeling!!!

As a few of you know, I had applied to take the LPN course out here about two years ago (it would have started in Jan of 08) unfortunately, it was cancelled due to the college revamping the course, etc. Needless to say I was disappointed. I have wanted to take an LPN course for over five years now, before I even moved out here...but Saskatoon didn't offer it at the time. I ended up taking the Home Support/Resident Care Aide course instead...it was half the length of the LPN (only six months instead of twelve) and was a good introduction into working in the health field. As I look back, I honestly don't think that I would have lasted twelve months straight through in school, as I hadn't been in school for quite some time! I probably would've dropped out. With taking the Care Aide course, I realized that I could do it! I've never had much confidence in myself when it came to school...I had a hard time in highschool...and I didn't enjoy the learning part that much...just the socializing:) When I went to hairdressing school, I graduated at the top of my class. I think wanting to do something over having to do something makes a huge difference! So last year, since it was my choice to be in school...I ended up graduating with Honors...would would've thunk it? Not me! Lol! So, I now know that I CAN do it! I am smart!

My last few posts have been mostly about leaving here. Someday, I hope we can, but until then, I NEED to make the best of it while I'm here! Last night I couldn't sleep. I started thinking about the LPN program again. I looked online at the one in Saskatoon...since lately, we've been kind of thinking of "home". At the moment, they are not taking any apps for next year and none from out of the province...and are going to be making it hard to get into the course by making it not first come first served...but instead who is the most qualified to take the course! That's how they're doing it for most of the course at the college in Saskatoon. Fair? I don't know. The waiting lists are crazy out there! So that wasn't really an option in my eyes. Then I looked at takinig the course through distance ed from a college in Edmonton. I wasn't too sure about doing the courses on my own...and then when I saw how much tuition was for out of province students...I axed that idea right away...its double for out of province students...crazy! In BC, the course is twelve months straight through...its a condensed course. In other provinces its two school years, or approx. 16mths. If I took it anywhere but here, I wouldn't graduate until 2012 if that...where as if I take it here, I'll graduate at the end of 2010!

So...... today I applied for the Jan 2010 LPN course and start upgrading in Bio on monday! Ahhhh!!! Then in Math in Sept. Crazy!!! As much as we've wanted to leave here...nothing seems to be happening. I finally decided that I need to make the best if things while I'm here...and achieving my goals can still be done while I'm here. I don't need to put my life on hold just because I'm not exactly where I want to be. I mean, a lot of people think that I hate it out here...I honestly don't. I just miss being able to see my family and friends from back home more than I do. I feel isolated out here in the winter...plus a few other things, but I don't hate it! A lot has happened in my life while being out here...a lot of mistakes have been made...but a lot of learning has also happened. Its all part of life...the good, the bad and the ugly. I just don't want to let another day go by thinking that I shoulda...but I didn't. If something happens between now and Jan and we end up moving...so be it. Atleast I'm prepared and have a plan if we don't. If I hadn't applied for the course and was still here in Jan...I would've been very upset with myself.

Well, I just wanted to share that with you all. Looks like I'm going to be busy for a while now...that'll be a good thing! I just pray that they don't end up cancelling the course again! That would honestly suck! I thank God for finally giving me the sense to just live and to stop regretting and thinking about things that may never be. He knows what He has planned for my life...all I can do is go to Him for guidance and hope that I'm doing the right thing in His eyes!