Some Fish

Jason's mom with her first Chinook...10lbs caught on the Kitimat River.
Jason's first Chinook of the season (hopefully not the last) also caught on the Kitimat. When he "set the hook" on this, his rod broke, but he was still able to "land" it. I missed all the action...but he was quite happy that his rod broke, cause now he can buy a better one!..someday:)

What the????

Its 4:32am...what on earth am I doing up? I have no idea...and blogging? I think I'm going crazy!

So things have slowed down a bit over the past couple of days. Jason's parents had been here for a few weeks and decided to take a break and go back home for a couple of weeks and then come back. His dad had big hopes of catching a nice Chinook...but not much luck. Jason caught one..21lbs, not too bad, his mom caught a 10lbs and his dad...well, he caught a 3lb...yes, a 3lb chinook. I don't think he was very impressed with that. Throw in a couple of pinks and that was it. Very frustrating for Jason's dad...and all of us. I wish we had a boat...that seems to be making all the difference out here these days. But we don't...maybe someday. They're planning on coming back for the coho run...hopefully we'll have better luck with that.

So as some of you know...we had some major flooding around here last month. One of our major river's out here...the Skeena, hasn't been very fishable since then...is fishable even a word? haha! But it has gone down and cleared up and people are finally able to fish it again. There are a couple of spots that we enjoyed going to...but today we went to check them out, particularly 18 mile and China Bar. Well, they're now pretty hard to get to...the water is just deep enough that I don't think I'd want to wade through it...we might have to invest in dingy or something LOL! Jason was quit disappointed. Those were his two of his favorite spots...and they were great spots for the kids to run around and play on. Maybe they'll get a bit more accessible as the summer (what summer?) goes on. Here we finally have a 4x4...and now we can't even use it to get onto China Bar like we had hoped. The flood changed so much around here. Islands that were in the middle of the river are half washed away...its crazy. Like I said in an earlier post...the power of water is amazing!

We had some friend over the other night for a fire in the backyard...it was nice to see them all. Stupid me though...never took one stinkin picture!! Oh well...we'll just have to do it again won't we? And next time...you better show up...you know who you are!! I don't care who's in town...haha, you know I love ya and I'm just teasin!

Well I should really go to bed. I just couldn't sleep and have been on the computer for a couple of hours now. I hope you're all doing well and that your summer's are warmer than the one we're having here!!

About last night...

Well turns out his appt today was just a consult...it wasn't the "actual" appt! Good grief! He took the whole day off and everything. Nice to know these things! Oh well.

I'm actually alot better today...thanks for your kind words everyone...I appreciate it!

Mixed Emotions

Well the time has come...and I'm a bit emotional about it. Tomorrow is V Day...yes, the old snipperoony for my poor hubby. I've had a few emotional moments today and last night. Its been almost five years since we had our last child. We have two beautiful children, they have completed my life in ways that I never imagined.

As some of you know, we had alot of problems concieving and staying pregnant. We suffered with my infertility problems for seven years. That is why our children are five years apart. I love the difference now...as its all I know, and I know that was the way that God had it planned for our lives. I've been at home with my children for almost ten years. I feel that there is a shift in our life now. Its "my" time...time for me to do what I want, what I need to do for me! Does that sound selfish or greedy? I hope not. Its been a long road...and I don't think that I could do it again (fertility treatments, etc.) I love my kids more than anything. They are both my miracles. But I think its time for a new chapter in our lives.

Sometimes its tough to move on...but I think its that time. Sure, I know there will be days that I will wonder...what if...but deep down, I know that we're done. I don't have a desire to really have anymore children...yet, if I was to discover that I was pregnant today...I'd be happy...and shocked, I'd just laugh. Its just saddening to think of all the trouble we had, the intense emotional rollercoaster that we went through...that its all done, that time is now coming to an end...that chapter of our life is finished. It really took a toll on me, and I think our marriage too. But we made it through. I'm finally feeling that I'm finding myself again...it took so much out of me, and its taken this long to get back to me! Not that I regret any of it...I don't, I know that I had to go through that...that was MY journey. That was God's plan for my life...and now this is a new journey.

I'm enjoying my kids so much these days...its so much easier these days...yet still tough. They too are going through new chapters in their own lives. My daughter is almost ten, things are "changing", if you know what I mean...haha. And my son will be starting school this fall. I will be alone for half a day, four days a week. What am I going to do? It'll be ten years since I didn't have a child in my home at some point in the day...and now it'll be a regular occurance almost everyday! Its kind of scary, yet exciting all the same. I'll have some "me" time. In some ways, I'm finding that I'm getting some of my "life" back...know what I mean?

See what I mean about having mixed emotions? I go back and forth about all of this...the pros, the cons. I know that my husband doesn't want anymore kids, and really, I don't either. I love kids...but we're done (do I sound like I'm trying to convince myself). Had we not of had the problems that we did, I think we would have had another one...but that wasn't the way it was suppose to be. I've only been on birth control for the first six months of our marriage...I've been married for thirteen years...ya, do the math! Sure its an emotional time. I think most people second guess themselves...maybe not. I'm not second guessing, I guess I'm just saying goodbye to a former goal...dream. But its time for new dreams, new goals...more adventures.

Well thats about it. I just needed to write this all out. Thanks for listening to me...I know that this is just the beginning of something else.

Its late...but who cares!

So its been an interesting past couple of days. We've been out fishing most of the week...and today, Jason finally caught his first Chinook (Spring) Salmon of the season! As soon as he set the hook, his rod snapped right in half, but by some miracle he was able to reel it in and land the sucker! We ate it, well most of it...yum yum good!

We're all so tired from enjoying the great outdoors this week. Ya right...more like the rain rain go away outdoors. Its been raining on and off all week...it sure wears on a person after a while! But thats BC for ya! Especially when you live near the coast! It just would be really nice to have some sunshine and a bit of warmth.

In other news around here, I was finally able to talk to my new facebook friend. I guess I should just call her my new friend, not facebook friend. Jordin is her name...and she is a sweetheart. She makes me laugh so hard! I have NEVER in my life had so much in common with someone as I do with her...its so very bizarre, its freaky actually...everytime we email eachother we find out something new about one another, but something that is the same between us! Its crazy! We finally hooked up on the phone last night. I came home from camping with the kids, Jason stayed camping with his parents. I put the kids to bed and gave her a call...we talked for four hours! It was awesome. I haven't talked that long on the phone since I was probably a teenager...if at all! I'm so happy that we met...and in the most bizarre way...but God was definitely a part of all of this, there's just no other way to explain it!! I just wish that she didn't live so far away (Ontario)...but hopefully someday we will meet in person!! I can't wait for that day! But until then we have email and the phone!

Tomorrow (or later today if we want to get technical) I get to spend some much needed time with some great friends. Its been a while...a week or two...but thats long enough since we've hung out! I'm looking forward to it girls! I need some "girl" time!

Other than that, things are pretty good. The kids are good and sleeping wonderfully with all the fresh air they've been getting. Syd actually caught a little fish today, I think it kind of took her by surprise. She tried to get it off but it wiggled its way free...it was too small to keep anyways.

We've been seeing alot of bears too, we actually saw a grizzly the other day...it was skinny and had huge feet, it looked so funny, so awkward. Speaking of grizzlies. Jason's cousin had a run in with one in Banff over the weekend. He went for a hike and turned a corner and saw the grizzly on the path. He knew what to do...but fear took over and he ran. It chased him and ended up on top of him. He screamed and screamed, and then it left. Amazing, but terrifying! I would have crapped, puked and peed all at once!!! God definitely saved his life, there's no other way to explain it! I guess he was feeling pretty bad about how he reacted. He walked away without a scratch! Amazing!

Well thats about it...this is getting long and I need to get to bed. I hope you're all doing well and enjoying your summer! Take care everyone!